Parents, the number one thing that your male child needs (besides love) is DISCIPLINE. As a parent, you are in the business of rearing a MAN and men need discipline. Discipline to do what needs to be done when they don't feel like doing it. Discipline to complete the task after the FIRST request, not the 2nd, 3rd, or 4th.
In order to train our sons to be disciplined, we must 1st discipline ourselves as parents. We must STOP YELLING at our children, get off our butts, and MAKE our children do what they need to do. We need to STOP LECTURING at our children and MAKE them do what needs to be done. We need to STOP giving TIME OUTs and MAKE our male children do what need to be done the 1st time.
We need to STOP GIVING WARNINGS without consequences and MAKE our children do what need to be done. Otherwise, the police system or the streets will do the job.
And if you can't do it, find a MAN or group of MEN to assist you to do the job that you can't (or will not) do. And don't tell me that there are no men or group of men near you who will not work with your child. You have uncles, granddads, men in church, men at your jobs, men in your neighborhoods, etc. MAKE those men you associate help you or DISASSOCIATE yourself from them. I don't care if daddy is active in his life, too often there are Black males in trouble and daddy is active in his life. Be mindful, there are a lot of dads who don’t know how to nurture and be loving towards their sons.
Our Black males don't need spoilage, they need LOVE & DISCIPLINE. Spoilage and Love are two distinct things. Spoilage is rewarding bad behavior with gifts, freedoms, and privileges. Love is getting in that butt and STAYING there when he breaks one of your rules or disrespects you. LOVE is making him EARN his privileges and freedoms back when he breaks your rules. And I don't mean within a few days or a week after his violates your LAWS. LOVE is disciplining your child when you are TIRED AS HELL yet you KNOW that this MUST be DONE.
LOVE is reminding him who pays the mortgage/rent, telephone bill, purchase the food, and healing him when he's sick. Love is understanding that he's doesn't have an active dad yet it is NO EXCUSE for him not excelling in academics and in life.
Spoilage is overcompensating because his dad isn't around by buying him EVERYTHING. Spoilage is unconsciously handicapping his growth and development because you are attempting to ‘protect’ him from harm. You can’t save your son every time he gets into trouble. Sometimes you have to let him fall in order to learn how to get back up.
Love is teaching him how to be responsible, respectful, hard working and motivated. Love is teaching him that life can be cruel and painful yet he MUST persevere and EXCEL! Failure is NOT an Option!! And if you don't think you have the tools to teach this, FIND A PROGRAM THAT WILL DO THIS!!
Spoilage is allowing a GROWN AZZ Male to live in your house and not contribute to its upkeep and well being. Spoilage is saying 'I can't kick my baby out in the streets'. Love is giving your grown male a timeline and a deadline for getting his act together. Love is following through with your timeline and deadline. Love is MAKING your grown male child to contribute or KICK HIS A…. OUT!!
And just because your child is a teenager, he doesn’t need less amount of attention. Teenagers need just as much attention as a toddler. The only difference is that teenagers can earn freedoms to do things outside of their parents’ supervision. But they still require attention and discipline.
We have too many Black males (and a growing number of females) who are not growing up with discipline and maturity. And until we as parents change our mindset and get control of our emotional dysfunctions, our children will be destined to FAILURE. Lead with your head as well as your heart.
Too many folks think that this is a single parent household issue, it is not. There are too many males who come from 2 parent household who are just as dysfunctional as those who come from 1 parent household.
This is a collective problem for Black people no matter the social-economic status. It's time to put our BIG BOY DRAWS or a BIG GIRL DRAWS on and BE parents!! There’s no manual as to how to be great parents, but there are some elders and parents who are doing a great job. Again, if you need help ASK!! Closed mouth don't get fed.
#UUNIK #STEAMISummer #BoystoMen #YouthDevelopment

Author: Reggie Jenkins

I was invited to a talk where Black people and white people discussed racism. Please don't invite me to these conversations. My position is this:
1. Black people don't need to talk to white people about racism/white supremacy. Most Blacks are confused about what this system is and how it works so what are they going to tell another group?
2. Blacks have been victimized by racism/white supremacy. You don't see a rape victim discuss rape and molestation with her assailant. How many times have you seen Jewish people discuss with Nazis about their collective oppression?
3. White people need to talk to other whites about this system because they are the ones practicing or benefiting from it globally. How many times have you've seen whites blow up the mayor's office phone or going in mass to the police station demanding certain officers who unjustly murder a Black person be removed, fired and charged? But if a white child was murdered, they would burn down the police station if justice wasn't served.
4. We've been discussing this system for centuries and nothing has fundamentally changed.
5. We are not the problem, racism/white supremacy is. Sure, we engage in behaviors of self hatred but what do expect from a group who experienced 300 year of chattel slavery/prisoners of war, 100 years of segregation/Jim Crow/lynchings, and another 50 yrs of gentrification/mass incarceration/state executed murders/outsourcing of jobs replaced by an influx of drugs by Contras and the CIA//piss poor schooling.
6. These discussions are disingenuous at best and doesn't lead to any practical, concrete solutions. Most whites and Blacks are afraid of being honest. Very few have the balls to deal with this system of racism/white supremacy. And in the end, most whites go back to environment of comfort and will not put any money, resources to the empowerment of Black people. And Black people go back to their living hell.
7. Powerful people will NEVER teach, help or empower powerless people how to obtain and maintain power. Most folks ain't sacrificing their lifestyles, their income, or their access to resources to help oppressed people.
8. We are going to have to accept the reality that the primary fight for freedom, justice and equity must come from Black people. Now, if others want to assist, tell them to give up some $$$ (without hidden agendas), resources, and organize amongst themselves to fight this system of oppression. But, under no circumstance, can we allow others to join our fight. Look at the history of NAACP, Urban League and other so-called Black institutions that was founded by and mainly financed by whites or others. How effective are these organizations today?
9. Just because a discussion is under the cloak of religion don't move me at all. In fact, it maybe an attempt to practice racism and an appeasement of white guilt. Many of the domestic terrorism that Blacks experienced in America were at the hands of white christians. KKK consisted of mostly white Christians.
10. I'm not into feel good sessions where we sing, pray and hold hands. If you ain't dealing the history of this country, your role in it our collective oppression and ain't open to sacrificing something to make our collective existence better, don't call me.

Reggie Jenkins, UNNIK Academy

In Knoxville, particularly within politics and amongst Black people, there's this thought process that its cool to continue to elect people (most of whom are older) who is cool to hang with and perceived to be a 'good' guy yet they don't do a damn thing to empower Black people. I know several so-called leaders whom I am cordial with yet I couldn't get more than $100 to assist me to empower the youth I serve. And I know that they sit on thousands of dollars (discretionary funds) that could fund not only UUNIK, but other Black non-profit organizations.
What we have to understand is that the power structure continues to help get these old guardians of power reelected. What's also troubling is that the lack of Blacks who vote locally. The same older group vote each election cycle and they usually vote for the same old guards whom they either live by or went to school with or are related to. Thus, we continue to get what we got.
2016 can mark a time of change where we get each other out and vote and FINANCE younger, vocal leaders who have the courage to stand with the people or it can display the same ole same. So I am encouraging more of you who are 45 and younger to vote locally and put $50 or more into a local political candidate. And STOP voting for the same person EVERY election cycle. STOP making politics a lifelong career for some folks. Get some NEW blood in office.
Also, take a friend to the polls. And if you don't live in a district that predominately Black, research the candidates in your area, figure out which you can make alliances with and vote them in.
Cause if we don't make a concerted effort this election cycle locally, our grandchildren will pay the price. And you will start seeing an alarming rate of Black Knoxvillians leave and never come back. If we aren't careful, East Knoxville will be no different demographically speaking than West, South or North